Moving On

The place of my life is distant to me,

a village of friends it will no longer be,

pastel grey troups and camouflaged guns,

cloud the saddened grey sky.

Trees that were upright, now cower and bow,

some people say it‘s for the future right now,

to damage the land, and detonate ground.

Singular Mouths

Vivid fantasies swirl of deep green seas,

and eyes of red, I close my eyes,

and dream of death.

Singular mouths muttering

strange new words,

abstract faces,

change too quickly to see,

people,

moving away from me.

Play house theatres,

puppets on strings,

so many eyes staring at me,

delving deep into misery,

criticising,

cultivating,

a fear long repressed,

disaster scenes and drawn out screams,

distant to the naked eye,

bees and wasps,

long and slim,

stinging me and sucking sin,

bottled up feelings.

Voices silent, but visible to me,

wolves howling, jagged in features,

birds so large they crush the earth,

spilling their love into colourful vases,

sticks and stones hurled at beasts,

longing to be wanted, but misunderstood,

tattooed on faces, I do not comprehend.

 

I’d Love

I‘d love to hang from every bough,

fall and rise with every wind,

I‘d love to trust upon a friend,

I‘d love to die upon a dream.

 

Free

Cancel out every thought,

give back whatever they have brought,

refund the price they offered me,

sell everything I‘ve got for free.

DISCARD. DISCARD. DISCARD.

Perfect Traveler

Perfect traveller, quieter ways I strode,

through the innermost chambers,

and flower laden hills,

out under the sky, neat and empty blue,

on and on to impassable prisons,

where moveless limbs strive to free,

I‘ll bury me under hill and star,

but yet shall keep my lordiest ride,

I eat no bread,

or talk not to the unanswering dead,

but my heart is still high,

in long known wisdom,

my dry breath tells

of the day to walk again,

not disconsoled

but cleansed by the world,

better oblivion in plenty,

than forgotten this storm century,

sentiments; I slowly call,

over boyish pastimes I idly fall,

and my innocent life, faded young past,

riddled hurt and woe just as new,

sickly I ponder how my terrible tomb,

they will praise and enfold,

with whispers so true,

but brave reluctance makes me think,

soon I will die and slip out of sight,

and no people will know of my terible plight.

Let Me See

I‘ll walk my chosen path

with my head held high,

until the sceptics slice it off,

they steal my clothes

and burn my books,

let me see.

A Penny For Me

A question hangs over my heart this day,

when the bells strike a stirring new day,

I call myself to be ever strong,

but the dawn is as weak as I can be,

as I walked from the house and into the street.

 

That Night

Hiding past the stony nurse,

I, gloomy and sad like an idiots hearse,

remembering her face and the empty purse,

pausing outside the sundrenched room,

faithfully shadowing her final tomb,

to see a figure of a heartbroken groom,

his pearly eyes steal life from me,

as if to pass on to his bride would be.

Stirring, breathing, living but barely.

It‘s your fault, I imagine him scream

that she lies still as a beam,

yet wanting to flow with a summer stream,

I can‘t hide my guilt, I eagerly cry,

but oh if she would ever die,

how would I console myself,

hoarding up emotions as wealth,

blur my fear and betray my health,

as she fades, her body bowed,

the sheet that clings as a purposeful shroud,

whispering but not too loud.

Did these feelings take seed in my brain,

or were planted by me to sprout insane,

It wasn‘t for me that this place I came

my soul will benefit too much I say,

this terrible deed, I can no longer pay,

the memories of her, keep them at bay,

but for how long can I forget that night

when everything I despise took flight,

in a flurry of obsenity, my muscles tight,

stole her freedom and will of life,

but oh to calm my temperate nerves,

and relieve my anger by her paper white face,

was it all really worthwhile

to commit an act so surely vile,

for peace of mind,

and a guilty conscience,

but to become what I hate the most,

I loved my sister, of that I boast,

to her loving heart, propose a toast,

with undeserving wine, and selfish laughter,

I think of only her and look to hereafter

Ink Blots

Time drags like like a convict‘s chain,

the twinkling candles that make no sound

breathe your sweet aroma deep underground,

I‘ll declare peace with me and then to you,

but my dreams suddenly crashed to the ground,

leaving me cold, and much too alone.

 

Fairground Clown

As I lay down my finger

on the sweetened night,

moths charge and linger

at my fireglow light,

reliving rituals

of shouts in the dark,

solid and sturdy,

hunting me down.

The honeycomb mask.

I wear with pride,

I don‘t envy this task

for there‘s nowhere to hide,

when you‘re scared of a clown.

the make-up smears,

revealing the splendour,

a sight for all to die for,

but never fear,

your time will come,

when the fairground

comes to town.

All The Same

Don‘t you hate it,

when it‘s your word against theirs,

you can‘t get a thought in anyway,

jump up and leave, that‘s what I‘ll do,

no-one will miss me anyhow.
Sweetness

Sleeping under the star swept sun,

I can‘t do anything else but think,

of what it may be, and how it was,

crouching behind the carpet sky,

I can‘t do anything else but cry,

howling beside the defaced moon,

paper thin feelings creep up soon,

sighing beneath the rampant storm,

you feel me and display me now,

seated behind the calmer blue,

featured here but ever true,

from here and now, it‘s sadists cue,

you fake any fear of what is new,

I love you, cherish, long and need you,

but just how long can I bear to feed you,

candid traets are sweetly made,

but my improvise is not denied,

the room to me can be transformed,

if only I know what I may need,

form and procedure are so important,

but love of life can be decisive.

OAP

The worst fear in my life

is to be left in the cold,

I‘m scared for you but I‘m too old,

I could kick myself from here on out.

Grass creaks as they walk on by,

every movement makes me shake,

if I stand my bones will break,

the young shall never know,

how I felt so sorry for her,

if only the world would end,

I‘m sure I really wouldn‘t mind,

as long as the sun can shine,

I‘ll be fine.

Fame And Suicide

Hanging on to tear drenched fears,

wringing out my last goodbyes,

happiness is nothing to me,

I want to end my life for once,

but from my windows comes only night,

close the curtains for one last time,

hide my mind from prying eyes,

shelter away from family ties,

locked away from shades of colour,

the end is near, I hope, I pray,

an animated frame is my life to me,

styled and groomed by publicity,

fame and fortune, riches and wealth,

five star hotels, and drink to good health,

I wish on the moon to be me again,

to have my own feelings,

and think what I want.

High prices I paid,

bad decisions I made,

numb with conviction,

afraid of the cold,

all I can do is wait.

 

Hold On

Picture this, a girl so smiling,

never wanting, always generous,

changing my perspecive in every way,

but holding on is all I ever do.

Generations may pass;

but I will always remember

how beautiful she was to me,

her smile inspired me every day,

but to hold on is all I can really do,

pride won‘t stop me showing how I feel,

shyness will never hold me back,

but it‘s so hard, not to just shrink away,

far from the cruel back-stabbing

from the people I call my friends,

I will always be here for her,

does she feel the same?

The love I feel is absolute,

but all I can do is hold on.

No Time

No space for timely thoughts again,

I knew the price I‘d pay, he cried,

the uttermost years; thick dust resided,

and unique life was mine no more,

strain and toil on my face lives on,

but my chance for joy has long been gone,

no time for happy thoughts.

Take The Time

I‘m too tired to laugh a while,

too weary of life to raise a smile,

my pride in you has left no hope,

as I carry on down that slippery slope,

I can‘t see straight, my head hangs down,

not enough strength to form a frown,

these next few hours are mine to take,

I‘ll calm my nerves before I wake,

but my eyes won‘t rest until you‘re well,

so I‘ll have to live through without you,

but what would you care,

when you don‘t even know me.

Thinking About Me

Too greedy to hear, too selfish to see,

why can‘t I always think about me,

I realise the landscap is criminally damaged,

but I want my products sealed and packaged,

why can‘t I always think about me,

I realise the oceans are filthy and polluted,

but surely the sewage can just be diluted,

why can‘t I always think about me,

I realise the earth will one day sleep;

and never awake,

But I‘ll just stay ignorant,

for old times sake.

 

What I Want

Croaking out my dying word,

I‘d love to shout to make me heard.

Selfishly Satisfied

Thinking about my own private world,

a world of my own devising,

and a land of calm comprimise.

Thinking within my own selfish world,

a world of my own destroying,

and a plan that‘s sure to go wrong,

sits an old man,

with an invisible friend,

yet to learn he‘s bound to move on,

and how quickly he‘ll forget.

Think, Remember, Smile

Different worlds, different lands, different civilisations,

ancestral wisdom from mysterious places,

universal rights for ‘primitive‘ sicieties,

language of music and African chants,

harmony, compromise and forgotten traditions,

couples, friends and a drink to good health,

freedom of creatures, knowledge and the life of Macbeth,

generations joining, gathering and happiness,

wizards, magic, and air sweet to taste,

Think. Remember. Smile............................

The Transporter

No safer way to travel, the words echo in my mind,

I see my world becoming smaller from a hundred million eyes

It‘s never failed, they said. A million to one chance.

I look down at my world, one final glance.

Molecueles moving, perpetual motion.

Swept away on solar winds, like ashes over the ocean.

Airbourne Elephants

Sitting in the dark, alone in my room,

with my head resting on the soft cushioned wall,

arms wrapped tightly by un-natural restraints.

They don‘t believe me, they don‘t see.

They don‘t see airbourne elephants, like me.

But they will, then I‘ll be free.

 

Moonlight

Beyond lampless streets of night

I breathe in dreams of soft delight,

the fingers of cold brush the city dumb,

the dark calls out, find me, oh come.

I need not hide hide my face tonight,

consuming forests ‘till wonderfully white,

swiftly I cast the gay shadows to turn,

of these silent wings we all must learn,

basking in candlelight, earths true fire,

the full glory of comfort, I will never tire,

the far reaching fields have presence of mind,

the gracious hands of this, I too will bind.

Spacious and shrouded, the grey faces are over,

give showers of daylight and visions of clover,

clear sighted I stride to the long drawn out day,

waiting once more for darkness and play.

Infectious Misery

Where do I belong, what did I do wrong,

I am astrange fruit my parents said,

and I don‘t know how to smile anymore,

but I really want to feel,

how can I survive,

I want to blend into myself

and shelter from the rain,

when it becomes the second day

everyone tries and fails,

the onus lies on me to make it not to be.

It Happens

 

I can‘t understand what makes it so real,

I‘ll always need my space to breathe,

but not like this, it‘ll never be,

I feel sick of all I see,

I‘ve never really thought,

but life‘s too short and to be seen.
The Gunshot Fox

The last day, the rest of my life,

when will it begin,

the moon casts shadows

over my whispering sin,

distantly beckoning, but how

oh how will my pursuit be felt,

bitter thoughts make chase on me,

running like a gunshot fox,

hiding from the midnight hour,

hoax, oh hoax, when will it come,

the lies they cry, the day I die,

anguished limbs in exquisite daze,

the path you‘re straying the trees are saying,

as gold clad jesters have beggars ways,

we all pass out into delicate night

tender but jewelled with armoured fright,

the evening tide sparkles it‘s last goodbyes,

the infinite horizen not sightless but clinging,

ten silent stars pull me toward the heavens,

serene yet pointed like blunted arrows,

fish obscure the true intentions

of my world, and form and unseen hues,

the once perfect sphere of life,

now gaunt, and twined with flowering eyes,

curls and bends with perpetual hush,

but vapours of what I once was

patiently play in breathless pain.

Every Time I See A Star

 

As I watch you sleeping tightly,

I dream on dreams to hold you tightly

crushing thoughts of sweet contentment,

enjoying life without reflection,

take the day as it feels it needs me,

only you can find a way to guide me,

every time I see a star,

I‘ll call it near,

and name it for you,

if I ever see a day,

for you I live,

and here I stay.
The IronicTumbleweed

I can‘t imagine this would ever happen to me,

judgement day they say is coming early for me,

the letterbox is shrouded in unused cobwebs,

the phone creaks wearily, like a saloon bar door,

an ironic tumbleweed rolls slowly down the hall,

whistling for me to follow, beckoning me to come.

As I walk into the kitchen, over tins and bags,

and putrid half eaten oranges and lemons,

i hear a laughing fom deep down inside,

the tumbleweed, It‘s just like everything else,

laughing behind my back, throwing the knives,

whispering failure into my wishing well ears.

i carry the plant to an hallucinated cliff,

bitterly and franticly jump like a cat,

grabbing an aching grip on fragile life,

embracing the tumbleweed as life itself,

I smile as a deranged fairground clown,

whistling a forced merry tune,

skipping toward the edge,

someone else‘s life flashes before my eyes,

the sooner the better everyone says:

No, I‘ve made up my mind,

I‘m on the way up,

but the way it schemes you can be sure

it has different plans for you.

Enough said.

Hammer You Down

I‘d hate to stay in this awful life,

the trees in the road hammer me down,

and I‘ll stay until the concrete pours,

over my head and into my mouth,

I‘m ready to be stepped on,

It‘s happened for years,

I sighed as it smothered my skin,

crushed my jaw,

and welded my eyes,

I‘ll open my lips and swallow it down,

to preserve my heart for all to see,

so just like today,

it doesn‘t really matter

Dear Time

Dear time, I‘m feeling sleepy,

I‘m going away,

don‘t try to be me,

because I like to be me..

I Wish

Dream of perfect passion stars,

hallucinated mountain Mars,

travel through sweet lit skies,

shout of people that‘s no surprise,

live forever at countries side.

Carousel

Carouselling around the room

to me and now it‘s all but doom,

normal things stick out at me,

hoplessly try not to miss you,

but when I‘m quiet

I dream to hold you,

so cowardly it must seem

that at at this I feel feel so low,

but at the end of the day

it‘s you I know.

What Do I Want?

Things aren‘t what they used to be,

I see things I‘m not to see,

take me far away from here,

without me choosing, should we fear,

live my life and shed a tear,

happy now don‘t get too near,

for idol times may soon be here,

yet soon surprise to you I bow.

Regress

Fill the pavement with shiny stars,

paint the road with a far universe,

leave the trees to feel the ground,

discard your skin, strip to the bone.

Slowly sleep, just now and then.

Can I Be?

What are you like in real life?

I fear for me and most for you,

I need nothing more than air,

to live and flex my rights out threre,

can I be smart, and love to be,

or stick it out as was meant to be,

or give it up with uncertainty,

cold water showers soak me through,

sweet and wet but leave me blue,

dimly lit nights make me brave,

hero enough to dig my grave,

strong enough to see my face,

will I just forget this fortune,

and wager fun for to begin.

To be a man, to stress my thoughts,

to the ever growing universe,

you can count on me to be,

I‘ll never care what I might see,

all I can say is I‘ll be me.

Bats

I‘m a shade greeted killer,

in cool gardened homes i sweep the sun,

whispering from tree to lowly tree,

creeping and dipping ‘till the quiet of night,

bringing greed and hate through my heavenly flight,

following the maze, swinging from sanity to triumph,

‘till the fever grows and seeks,

the grotesque rythm of my rythmic fingers,

pulses my heart,

but drifting unconciousness lays me waste,

in a fleeting embrace, obscure my lips,

narrow and tangled,

the roots of my life, distant to all,

pulled through fire and drowned in black,

this is all I‘ll ever be,

blind, deathless and drunk on times scarce blood.

What I Want

Calmer laughter, what I want,

there is nothing she won‘t know,

I‘ll give her a life, that no-one can take,

and if she says no, I‘ll leave her alone

but to me she‘s a light.
Tempted

Shelter I sought in my burning windy hill,

rose crowned igloos atop my lover‘s window sill,

the jack of Hearts passed on today,

with faltering faith, and consistent tread,

laughing until it shakes my finely intricate shed,

fingertips of calm stroked my face,

i wept among the leaves,

that flung me hard unto this place,

I fall asleep, between the shaken boughs I lie,

then the voice swept over me,

crying of wayside places,

hidden at last from all the world,

i trod as quiet night-time races,

the land that beckoned green and gold,

will I always feel the cold,

stumbling on with steady paces,

‘till the water‘s far beneath me,

my vision guided by unseen forces,

eyesight strayed like restless horses,

down into the baffled oceans,

harbours twelve old lonely winters,

rippled frost shapes ten foot cobras,

spitting poison into my mouth,

i want so much to return again,

but that life for me was yester-year,

this world it seems just not to hear.

No Goodbye Kiss

Leaving home for one last time,

waiting for an unknown sign,

drawn away from friendly eyes,

life is magic, sweet times and sighs,

thinking, packing my last farewell,

how much I loved this place I could never tell,

saving my favourites ‘till the very last moment,

directing addresses for letters that won‘t be sent,

sitting by a heatless fire, I can‘t ever get too near,

life goes on without a goodbye kiss.

Frail Simplicity

No one triumphs in the simplicity of life,

chanting decisions without thought or pride,

trapped inside a stammering frame,

unbroken hours of meaningless length,

a million minutes, eyes grow weary,

timeless peace, soothes the heart,

faint spells lift cups with drifting dreams,

caught up in words, immortal to ear,

poised to strike in childrens ideas,

follow, follow the echoeing footfalls slip.

I meet folk no longer happy with the night,

or hungry for gods and a warm homely fire,

yet tearning skin so soft to the touch,

the crooked lanes we inevitably lead,

show level waters and calm blue seas,

that‘s all I seek for final sleep,

so simplicity is life with no convictions,

happiness and joy are my only addictions.